So this one time I went to a bar, see. And there was this guy there. Not really my type but apparently I was his. He started talkin' and I started drinking. I didn't stop, neither did he. Like an idiot I gave him my phone number. What did I care? It was a phone number not sex. He leaned over and kissed me. I saw it coming and my brain said 'run for the hills Maria! They're singin' to ya!' But my lips kissed back. Beer=bad. I pushed him away. I guess he took that as 'I wanna date you'. A shove is a shove. So like an idiot, I go out with him, see. I sneak some friends in on the date. The more the merrier right? So right. It's strange. I get lost watching other people on their dates. “We're here again?” is the look on every girl's face. “A pitcher of beer and salsa? That's all ya got?” Cheap trick. I forget I'm on a 'date' and start writing each tables' story. I'm laughing to myself, happily ignoring said date. This is the longest hour of my life thus far. Two more followed. Boredom kills, one out of one stupid chick who goes on unbearable date. I'm starting to feel depressed. Am I a magnet for weirdos and guys who just want some...chips? I don't mind in the end because inspiration comes from experience. Boy. I've had enough experiences in the last six months to fill a dime-store novel. That's what it'd be worth too. I'm not saying I'm proud...I'm just sayin' it's hard to be so damn good-looking. I'm gonna go through life with my eyes closed...and my lips...and well, other things. Life is rough kiddo. Don't take it lying down. That just leads to babies and pain relievers. Charge it head on. And beat the crap out of it...once in a while...
Love, Your Auntie
No comments:
Post a Comment